Saturday, 4 October 2014

[HM:257500] How Can I Improve the standard of my Thoughts:




a)    Avoid thinking about unnecessary things specially related to others. Mind your own business. Posses a focused mind.
b)    Stop comparing yourself to others. It's an insult to yourself. You are a unique soul and you are independent on your living, your decisions and your destiny.
c)    Don't think of monetary gains too much. Excessive love for money and assets is the root of most of stresses.
d)    Develop the habit of forgiving and letting things go off. If you are keeping the grudge in your brains for longer durations, you are killing yourself. Stress is a slow poison which deepens its roots your brain and destroy your physical and mental health.
e)    Read quality quotes or articles on positivity and try to absorb the message. This will kill the germs of negativity.
f)    Practice the habit of gratitude. Stop complaining, criticizing and blaming. When a negative thought comes in, convert it to positive by looking at the positive side of the issue.
g)    Instead of thinking about your 'wants' too much, think about your needs. This will reduce the magnitude of your focus because usually needs are limited but wants are too many. Adapt simple life style as it reduces unnecessary socio-economical issues

--
--
We are also on Face Book, Click on Like to jois us
FB Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hyderabad-Masti/335077553211328
FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hydmasti/
 
https://groups.google.com/d/msg/hyd-masti/GO9LYiFoudM/TKqvCCq2EbMJ

---
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Hyderabad Masti" group.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to hyd-masti+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com.
For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/d/optout.

Friday, 3 October 2014

[HM:257499] How to Build Trust to Empower Relationships




By Junaid Tahir
During my recent training on Management, the course of discussion slightly moved to the subject of Building Trust. Our trainer (my mentor as well) draw our attention to some important aspects of building trust. Since the idea of writing this article was originated during the training so I dedicate this article to my teacher, Georgie Collis, as she sowed the seed in my brain to produce this article.


So, before we go in to the details on how to develop trust, let us understand what Trust is !
Trust is the permanent certainty and confident expectation from someone for something. Lack of trust might lead to shattered relations so Trust is the most critical ingredient for strong relationship; the relation which can either be between Husband-Wife, Boss-Employee, Father-Son, Brother-Sister, supplier-customer and so on.

Here are some recommended behaviours which you need to demonstrate in order to develop trust:
1-    Being Responsible: ensure you are performing your day-to-day responsibilities and meeting the short-term and long term expectations by your dependants.
2-   Listen: Listen, Listen, Listen. God has given you two ears and one tongue so you listen more and speak less. Effective Listening is a skill; develop this habit. 
3-   Being Truthful: Be honest and fair. Don't deceive someone. Remember the fact that building trust is tough but it takes seconds to have scratches-in-the-jewel which usually is very hard to recover.
4-   Keeping Promise: your promise is your commitment with someone to do something, so don't break at any cost. In case you couldn't meet your promise, there is always a door for dialogue for re-consideration of things. In case of dialogues be fair, be truthful and be open. Confess the short comings on your end.
5-   Consistent behaviour: the ever changing attitude is an indication of your non-predictive personality which is an anti-trust drive. So be consistent in what you speak and what you do.  
6-   Apologizing behaviour: Sorry is the best medicine in healing relationship complications. In fact, Sorry and Thanks are the two golden words which my Kindergarten going son has refreshed for me which he learnt from school. Use them often and you will see massive improvements in your daily life.
What are your suggestions to develop Trust?



--
--
We are also on Face Book, Click on Like to jois us
FB Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hyderabad-Masti/335077553211328
FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hydmasti/
 
https://groups.google.com/d/msg/hyd-masti/GO9LYiFoudM/TKqvCCq2EbMJ

---
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Hyderabad Masti" group.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to hyd-masti+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com.
For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/d/optout.

Thursday, 2 October 2014

[HM:257498] Conscience - Your Great Companion

By Junaid Tahir:
Nature has awarded us with such a great tool called conscience. 
It generates positive and negative signals for the actions you perform. 

When you buy food for the hungry with sincerity,
when you give some money to an orphan with love,
when you pay the education fee for a poor student, 
when you give some money to a free services hospital,
your conscience sends you a thank you signal and you feel good about yourself which gives birth to your 'inner' satisfaction.

It is said that you don't really achieve deep happiness by spending on yourself; you get it when you spend on others !!! And even you achieve greater degree of contentment when you spare your time from your busy life, visit any orphans or widows place, hospitals and other deserving people of society and then spend your money on them.


From religious perspective, I believe that almost all of the religions have defined the principle of spending on humanity in order to get tranquillity, serenity and prosperity. However, we the unfortunate people, the materialistic minds, keep calculating our money and assets several times a day which increases our greed level and eventually deprives us from peace of mind. It won't be wrong if I say that our extreme love for money and being materialistic is the real killer of our happiness.

To cope up with this, the wise people highly recommended to allocate a little portion (5% of your earnings) for the genuine causes. 

While the conscience claps for our good acts, it must generate red signals for our bad acts too. And if that is not happening then something is seriously wrong in our roots of faith. Considering the fact that a clean and active conscience is the best pillow, we must empower it by more positive acts as well as with daily self audits when our head is on the pillow at the end of each day.

Some article you may like:

Do You Keep People Happy



--
--
We are also on Face Book, Click on Like to jois us
FB Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hyderabad-Masti/335077553211328
FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hydmasti/
 
https://groups.google.com/d/msg/hyd-masti/GO9LYiFoudM/TKqvCCq2EbMJ

---
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Hyderabad Masti" group.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to hyd-masti+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com.
For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/d/optout.

[HM:257497] How to Avoid Negative Thoughts



By Junaid Tahir

I have noticed in my 33 years of life that human mind tends to think negative more as compared to positive. There are several contributing factors for negative thinking such as, bad official or personal circumstance, financial issues , medical problems and/or family bonding. In this article I am going to touch some of issues which lead human mind towards negativity, consequently killing the peace of mind.

Personal Circumstances: Once I read somewhere that life is what 20% happens to you and 80% how you react to it. Its true; believe me. Its only our own thinking & reactions responsible for our peace of mind. No matter what are the circumstances, there is always a way out. My personal approach to fix the BIG issues is to break the BIG issue into several smaller issues and start fixing one by one; one at a time. Always remember that keep thinking negative on issues will keep increasing the weight of the problems. It's just like holding the glass of water for one minute compared to holding this for one hour. If you hold a glass for one hour, your shoulder and arm will start paining. This is how your negative thoughts kills your brain and takes away your peace of mind.

Misunderstanding: there is a quote: "I am responsible for what I said but not responsible for what you understood". I personally agree with this however I would like to add that the responsibility falls on both, the speaker and the listener . The speaker is to make sure that he has elaborated his point very well by using right words and proper details. The Listener is to make sure that he understands things correctly. In case of ambiguity, he needs to ask again, even again if something is unclear else there is a serious chance that a negative thing is going to be concluded. Clarity in our day to day communication can definitely wash away the element of misunderstanding. So I stop this paragraph with famous quote "Seek first to understand and then to be understood"

Financial Limitations: Life is beautiful, we make it tough by putting a lot of weight by adding more and more wishes into it. I would suggest always try to differentiate between Needs and Wants. Try to live in your needs and you won't be sad again. Another advice would be to think of less-fortunate people quite often instead of always dreaming about rich people. If you want to become rich, start working on it by preparing a concrete plan, however don't let this plan & actions to steal your peace of mind. Don't allow your brain to adopt short cuts which are based on negative strategies. Negative approaches result in negative outcomes; sooner or later so be positive and adopt positive approaches.

Family Relations: Having healthy family relations is a real blessing. This is something you can find hundreds of books in the market or on internet. However, I must say that each one of us must learn the tips and techniques to have healthy family relationships. A straight forward approach to resolve small conflicts is to 'Convince or Get Convinced'. There shouldn't be anything in between. For the bigger issues, the suggestion is to break the problem in small issues and fix it one by one, as stated earlier.
Further, we must develop the power of patience in ourselves. Patience also means listening other empathetically and understand other's point of view. This helps conclude right things.

Office Stress: I have developed my own formula to manage office stress in order to reduce/fix the negative thoughts and stress. The formulae is that for any given situation apply two filters to the problem. First filter is to ask yourself whether  this issue is really something I should be worried about. If not, just drop and you are done. Second filter is that can I "Park" this problem for sometime so I can concentrate on other things and use my healthy brain for other positive things. 'Parking' has some advantages… for example, you are controlling your mind not to think of this particular issue for the time being and hence avoiding negativity and stress. Sometimes the issues are resolved at their own as we move along. However, if any issue really needs to be fixed then we should develop the power of analyzing the situation at Work Break Down level so that we can fix all small issues which are the root cause of the original issue.   
Article written by Junaid Tahir (mjunaidtahir -at- gmail.com). Feel free to share your feedback.


Conclusion: No one is in charge of your happiness except you so control your thoughts since thoughts are the driving force for your actions which are defining your character and character is the most important ingredient of your destiny.

--
--
We are also on Face Book, Click on Like to jois us
FB Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hyderabad-Masti/335077553211328
FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hydmasti/
 
https://groups.google.com/d/msg/hyd-masti/GO9LYiFoudM/TKqvCCq2EbMJ

---
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Hyderabad Masti" group.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to hyd-masti+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com.
For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/d/optout.

[HM:257496] How Should a Suit Fit? Your Easy-to-Follow Visual Guide


If you’re dressing on a budget, one of the most popular pieces of advice out there is to buy off-the-rack suits in the best fit you can get, and then take them to a tailor for custom adjustments.

That’s good advice. You’ll find it in several articles right here on the Art of Manliness.

But if you’re really going to get any benefit out of having your suits adjusted, you need to know a little bit about tailors and the kinds of adjustments they can (and can’t) make.

You also need to know what a “good” fit actually looks like.

Tailors vary in skill and in how they communicate the work they’re doing, so getting a suit adjusted is only going to deliver a good return if you can make your exact needs clear.

Below, we give you an easy-to-follow rundown on how your suit should fit.

What a “Good Fit” Looks Like

Good-Fit-vs-Bad-Fit-400-AOM

Can you guess which man had his suit tailored to fit?

When you try on a suit, you’re looking for a good fit in what’s called your “natural stance.”

That means standing up straight, preferably in the kind of dress shoes you’ll be wearing with your suits, with your arms relaxed at your side.

It’s not actually a very natural posture for a lot of us, but it is the base from which most of our movement flows. If the suit doesn’t fit well in this stance, it’s not going to move comfortably with your body either.

Practice standing in that relaxed, upright pose, and then start trying on suits in that posture. Look for a good fit in the following areas when you’re in your natural stance:

The Shoulder

Shoulder_cAOM&RMRS_400

A well-fitted shoulder lies flat. The seam on top of the shoulder should be the same length as the bone under it, and should meet the sleeve of the suit right where your arm meets your shoulder.

If the seam that connects the sleeve to the jacket is hiked up along your shoulder bone, or dangling down on your upper bicep, the jacket is never going to sit properly. In these instances, you’ll see “ripple effects” that create lumps or wrinkles on the sleeve and the top of the jacket.

Shoulders are one of the hardest parts of a jacket to adjust after construction, so don’t buy a piece with an ill-fitted shoulder. Odds are you’ll never be able to get it quite right with post-purchase alterations.

The Seat

Seat_cAOM&RMRS_400

The back of your trousers should be a smooth drape over the shape of your rear end — whatever that happens to be.

A good fit in the seat will lie loosely against your underwear, without pulling tight against your butt or draping loosely down your thighs.

You can spot a bad fit in the seat when there are horizontal wrinkles just under the buttocks (caused by too tight of a fit), or by loose, U-shaped sags on the backs of the thighs (caused by too loose of a fit).

A tailor can “take in” a seat to make it tighter in the back without too much difficulty, but there’s a limit to how far he can go. If the seat was way too loose to begin with, it’s not possible to adjust it to fit without pulling the pockets out of place.

Unless the pants have an unusual amount of spare cloth on the inside, seats can’t be “let out” very far to make the fit looser. Err on the side of too loose rather than too tight when buying.

Trouser Break

Trouser-Break_cAOM&RMRS_400

The “break” is the small wrinkle caused when the top of your shoe stops your trouser cuff from falling to its full length.

This should be a small, subtle feature. One horizontal dimple or crease is usually ideal. The cuff should indeed rest on the top of your shoe — there needs to be contact — but it shouldn’t do much more than that. The trouser can fall a touch longer in the back than in front, so long as it’s still above the heel of the shoe (the actual heel, not just the back of the shoe).

This is one of the easiest adjustments to make, so you can rely on making some changes here if you need to. In fact, dress pants are often sold unhemmed, with the assumption that the purchaser will take the trousers to a tailor (or make use of the store’s tailor if there is one) to have the cuffs fitted.

The Jacket Closure

Jacket-Closure_cAOM&RMRS_400

When you are wearing a suit and standing, you should have the jacket buttoned (you know the jacket buttoning rules, right? Click here to learn!).

This means that part of the trying-on process is checking how the front of the jacket closes over your body.

Close a single-breasted jacket with only one button when you’re testing the fit, even if it’s a three-button jacket. You’re looking to see if the two sides meet neatly without the lapels hanging forward off your body (too loose) or the lower edges of the jacket flaring out like a skirt (too tight).

The button should close without strain, and there should be no wrinkles radiating out from the closure. A little bit of an opening at the bottom of the suit is fine, but the two halves beneath the button shouldn’t pull apart so far that you can see a large triangle of shirt above your trousers. (Ideally, you shouldn’t see any, though a bit is socially acceptable, especially when you move.)

Taking in or letting out the waist to help the jacket close more comfortably is not a difficult adjustment, but it’s one with limits. Don’t expect a tailor to be able to make huge changes here. If the jacket closure looks really bad unaltered, it’s probably due to problems beyond the waist measurement, and you should be looking for a different jacket rather than planning on getting that one altered.

Jacket Sleeve Length

J.SleeveLength_cAOM&RMRS_400

“A half-inch of linen” is a good, old-fashioned guideline for the relationship between a suit jacket and the shirt worn under it — about half an inch of the shirt cuff should be visible beyond the jacket cuff.

That said, it’s a general guideline, and you don’t need to get too obsessive. What you do need to be sure of is that the suit sleeve doesn’t rise above the cuff entirely — the seam where the shirt cuff joins the shirt sleeve should never be visible.

Similarly, the jacket sleeve should never hide the shirt sleeve entirely. At least a small band of shirt cuff should always be visible.

For most men, that ends up being a jacket sleeve that terminates just above the large bone in the wrist. But everyone’s arms are slightly different, and sleeve length is a very easy adjustment for a tailor to make, so get the best sleeve length you can (erring on the side of too long if possible) and then have it adjusted to fit.

Jacket Length

Jacket-Length_cAOM&RMRS_400

Not enough time or writing gets devoted to the overall length of men’s jackets. It’s more important than most people think!

A good suit or sports jacket should fall past the waist and drape over the top of the curve formed by the buttocks. An ideal fit will cover a man down to the point where his butt starts to curve back inward, and stop there (but anywhere in that general region is okay).

The hands are also a good marker here, and this is why it’s important to have your arms relaxed in your natural stance. The hem of the jacket should hit right around the middle of your hand — at or just past where the fingers meet the palm.

If the hem of the jacket is sitting on top of the butt, with a small little flare in the back, it’s too short. If it falls past the bottom entirely, longer than the arms, it’s too long. The hem can be adjusted upward without too much trouble, but if you go too far the front pockets start to look out of proportion, so don’t count on more than an inch or two of adjustment here.

Jacket Collar

Jacket-Collar_cAOM&RMRS_400

It’s easy to tell a well-fitted collar from a poorly-fitted one, although identifying the cause of the bad fit can be challenging.

Your jacket collar should rest against your shirt collar, which in turn should rest against the back of your neck. All of these should touch lightly, without significant gaps in between.

If the collar is too loose, it’s very easy to spot — there will be a gap where it’s flopping back off your neck.

A tight collar is a little harder to spot on a jacket, since (unlike a shirt collar) it’s almost all in the back. Turn from side to side as needed and check it out in a mirror. A tight collar will create bunching and folds just beneath it, and often wrinkles the shirt collar underneath it as well.

Bad collar fit could just mean the neck size is wrong for you, but it’s often caused by a larger fit issue: bad shoulder sizing, a back panel that’s too small for you, or even a jacket that’s constructed with more of a forward or backward tilt than your neutral stance.

Since these adjustments cost time and money to fix, you want to get as good of a fit in the original jacket as possible at the collar.

Four Automatic “Bad Fit” Warnings

There are a couple of easy to spot problems that are major warning signs. A suit with these “bad fit” signs is one that you probably won’t ever be able to adjust to a really good fit.

Unfortunately, most of them are caused by the core structure of the suit — and that means that your body just isn’t a good match for the way that particular brand makes its pieces.

Be patient, try on lots of brands, and don’t compromise (unless you know it can be fixed!).

If you can’t afford bespoke (made to order), an adjusted off-the-rack suit can work — but you have to start with a pretty good fit in the first place, or it’s never going to get the results you want.

Unless you want to pay for alterations, be careful buying any jacket that’s showing these serious warning signs:

The Dreaded X-Shaped Button Strain

Dreaded-X_cAOM&RMRS_400

If you can see wrinkled lines radiating outward from your jacket button when you close the jacket, it’s too tight and will need adjustment.

The Dreaded X, as my friend Barron over at Effortless Gent likes to call it — is not a look you seek in a well-fitted jacket.

Front button strain is indicative of a bad fit in the torso, and it can go beyond just the waist size — you’re probably straining at the shoulders or in the back, too. On a more basic note, it also means the button is going to be prone to popping off.

Don’t buy a jacket that shows strain lines radiating outward from the button. If you’ve got an old jacket that used to fit but has started showing them, it’s possible that you’ve either gained weight or accidentally shrunk the jacket in a wash — in that case (assuming the fit was good before), you may be able to have the waist let out a little and keep the jacket in use.

Shoulder Divots & Upper Arm Wrinkles

Shoulder-Divots_cAOM&RMRS400

If the sleeve of the jacket seems to dip in slightly just under the shoulder, and then flare back out again, the shoulders are too big. What you’re seeing is the shoulder padding protruding beyond your arm, and the cloth of the sleeve tucking back in underneath it.

You can also get those wrinkles if you’ve got a somewhat slouched stance and the jacket is stiffly-constructed for a more upright posture. In either case you’ll need to get a smaller size, so that the seam where the shoulder meets the sleeve matches up with your body’s shoulder, or give up and try a different brand.

Shoulder Wrinkles — Top Rumpling

ShoulderRumpling_cAOM&RMR400

If you’re getting noticeable bunching on top of your shoulder, rather than on the upper sleeve, the jacket is too large in the shoulders.

This could be a simple length problem, but more likely it’s that the interior space is simply too large — your shoulders aren’t broad enough, front to back, to fill out the jacket.

Try a slimmer fit, if the manufacturer offers multiple styles, or a smaller size. If you’re still seeing wrinkles on the tops of your shoulders, the brand probably isn’t going to work for you.

Twisted Sleeves — Bad Sleeve Pitch

Sleeve-Pitch_cAOM&RMRS400

Faint spiraling wrinkles on the outside of the sleeve occur when the angle of your arm in its natural stance doesn’t match the angle that the sleeve was constructed with. The result is a sleeve that looks slightly twisted even when your arms are hanging still at your sides.

A tailor can theoretically remove the sleeves and reattach them at a slightly different angle, but it’s not a simple or a cheap fix. Generally speaking, you can consider this one a deal-breaker. Keep trying until you find a jacket where the sleeves fall smooth and straight when your arms are resting in their natural stance.

_________________

Written By: Antonio Centeno
Founder of Real Men Real Style


--
--
We are also on Face Book, Click on Like to jois us
FB Page: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Hyderabad-Masti/335077553211328
FB Group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/hydmasti/
 
https://groups.google.com/d/msg/hyd-masti/GO9LYiFoudM/TKqvCCq2EbMJ

---
You received this message because you are subscribed to the Google Groups "Hyderabad Masti" group.
To unsubscribe from this group and stop receiving emails from it, send an email to hyd-masti+unsubscribe@googlegroups.com.
For more options, visit https://groups.google.com/d/optout.