handling them or other conversations that sap your energy and don't
inspire success.s
1) Steer the conversation
If a friend starts being negative, try to steer the conversation in
a more positive way. For example, if a friend starts complaining
about the rain say, "Yes, but I love the way it makes all my
flowers grow."
For every negative thing you hear, retaliate with a positive take
on the situation. Perhaps the person doesn't realize just how
negative they really are.
2) Avoid gossip
Gossip is a form of negativity. Unfortunately, it's everywhere.
Gossip newspapers line the shelves at the supermarkets. A family
calls you with the latest family "news". A coworker wants to tell
you about another coworker.
Not only does gossiping waste precious time, it isn't healthy.
Politely tell people that you aren't interested in gossip and will
form your own opinions about people.
Also avoid celebrity gossip, as this can be just as damaging to
your life. Gossip often breeds envy when in reality, you can
accomplish things in your life as long as you tear yourself away
from the television or gossip magazines.
3) Just say no
If someone is persistently negative around you, don't be afraid to
tell them that you don't appreciate it. Of course, try to find a
diplomatic way to say so. Explain that you generally like to look
at life in a positive way and you feel that their comments are
damaging.
4) Try to understand
It may help if you try to understand why someone is being negative.
Maybe there is something you can do to try to help them? There are
many root causes to negativity. These include abusive
relationships, discontent, or clinical depression.
Perhaps if they realize that someone generally wants to see them
happy, they will change. Don't invest too much of your energy in
this, though.
Often, negative people don't really change because they don't want
to. Trying to help can be just as much of an energy drain as
actually listening to their comments.
5) Be positive
If you realize that you have a problem with negativity, don't try
to change all at once. This is a bad habit that can be broken, it
just takes time. Start out by promising yourself that you will say
one positive thing each day. If you catch yourself thinking
something negative about the weather, turn it into a positive, for
example. After you get comfortable, say two positive things.
Continue increasing until you are free of your habit.
Just be careful not to confuse negativity with honesty and
constructive criticism.
source: unknown
| M Junaid Tahir Read my blog : http://paradigmwisdom.blogspot.com/ Join my group: https://groups.google.com/group/ParadigmWisdom |
I have noticed people thinking/talking about money all the times. The people are so much concerned about money that they count every single penny they have spent or going to spend. When I ask about this, their answer usually is that saving money is associated with the economical richness which is linked with their future happiness. This is fine however there are several catches which should be considered in parallel; for example, if one is saving money by:
1- compromising on health (eating less or eating bad quality food or not eating healthy diet to save money). Is this a good deal in the long run?
2- Not spending on his family's needs so depriving them from their rights. Is this a good idea?
3- Not giving gifts to his family members, consequently straining the family relationships which results in tense environment at home. Is this a good deal?
4- Not visiting friends and other family members so jeopardizing the social life. Is this a good way of living?
5- Not paying taxes to government so committing crime which is punishable in this world and hereafter.
6- Not paying Zakat/charity so depriving the less fortunate to enjoy the life and polluting the whole income and join the gang who are not in good books of Lord.
While analyzing the scenario of association of money with Happiness, I had these questions in my mind. What is the real definition of richness? Is this only money which one should be craving about? Or there are other things which need to ponder as well? Can wealth make me happy? What is real wealth? While thinking about the answers I concluded that there are four things which can make me happy. 1) Good Family Relations 2) Good Official Life 3) Good economical status 4) Good social Life. While thinking about Wealth, I ended up with having these types of wealth:
1- Physical Wealth
This is a great blessing indeed. If my major body parts are functional, nothing like that. I already posses loads of wealth. Imagine a millionaire having a plastic leg or hand. What if Lord offers you to exchange a million dollars at the cost of your eye or Leg? Off course you would never go for that option. So you have to feel happy about being healthy as this is amazing blessing. I would highly recommend not saving money at the cost of my health. And If you do it today, you will do it reverse as well, that means, you will be spending the same money to recover your health but off course with all the side effects of bad health. The article written by Junaid (mjunaidtahir at gmail dot com – feel free to comment)
2- Family Wealth
Family wealth means having healthy family relationships may it be with mother or spouse or kids. This is something extremely important to which everyone should work considering the fact that a major percentage of our life is spent with the family members. Keeping your family happy does not involve a lot of money expense hence you can keep your family happy by small good deeds even. For example, eating ice cream at the end of the day with all family, taking family to a park on weekend, sharing jokes before going to bed and/or bringing small nice gifts can make big difference for making family bonds stronger and stronger whereby increasing Family Wealth.
3- Inner Wealth
This is something which controls your emotions, your behavior, your character and definitely your destiny. Being optimistic, problem solver and positive thinker will make you a super hero in true colors. These qualities can bring about superb results and would control your peace of mind ultimately. Always remember: No one is in-charge of your happiness, except you. So control your thoughts and have a healthy "Inner Wealth" bank account. The article written by Junaid (mjunaidtahir at gmail dot com – feel free to comment)
4- Career Wealth
A positive environment, a nice colleague at work, a genuine team leader and a mature department head are real blessings. But sometimes you won't get all these in one package as it is said that you can select your friend but cant select your Team Leader or Director. However you can learn to manage your office environment up to large extent, you can manage your time and work load. You can have a balanced work-home load. You can sharp your skills by reading/trainings etc. Career Wealth is something which cannot be ignored while striving for happiness. There is load of information on internet which you can read to improve your "Career Wealth". Google it.
5- Economical Wealth
I believe I don't need to write any specific thing in this category as everyone already working on it day to day. I must say that economical savings should never be done at the cost of your Physical Wealth or Family Wealth. Further, we should always put aside a small percentage of money (say 5%) for social causes (hospital, helping needy families, spending on less fortunate people and other charity causes). From a Muslim's perspective, every single penny you spend in Allah's way is being saved in your Akhira Bank Account and you are going to get the benefit up to so many time based on your intensions and offcourse this results in Baraka in your family !!!
6- Impact Wealth
This is something different from other categories. Do you have a wealthy mental approach so that you do something for society. Everyone lives for himself but do you live for others? Are you helping person? Are you taking part in any social causes? Helping others gives real peace of mind and happiness so in my opinion it is a type of wealth. So how much Impact Wealth do you own? The article written by Junaid (mjunaidtahir at gmail dot com – feel free to comment)
Conclusion: Life is all about love and peace. We have to have simple rules for living. Complications arise when we start taking life too seriously by thinking about our wants too much. We have to live more with our Needs than our Wants J
First glimpse: A leaked shot of the Google Nexus tablet - a seven-inch machine which may make apple pay attention
Google is taking a shot at stealing the iPad's throne with a seven-inch 'Nexus' tablet.
The tablet, which is set to be officially announced at Google's developers conference starting on Wednesday, will be named 'Nexus', which Google gives to all of its flagship machines.
The tablet is said to be available in a white-and-black finish, and contain a high-end 'Tegra3' quad-core chip, pitching it against top-of the-range devices and yet at an extremely competitive price - $250 for the 16GB model, and £199 for the 8GB model.
If these prices translate to the UK - which is possible, if Google's aim is to get the tablet established in the market, - that is £160 and £128 respectively.
Android tablets are nothing new, and there have been a batch of good models from the likes of Acer and Samsung, but now Google is fighting with its teeth.
Building a tablet in-house means ends-to-end quality control, and Google may be able to shave the budget right down to the bone with a product that works as a loss-leader' rather than a for-profit device.
Android has huge success with their budget Fire tablet, also based on Android, and it has proved extremely successful in the U.S.
If Google can replicate this success, it could take some of the allure from Apple's great but expensive tablet, as well as attracting more developers to Android, and ensuring other Android manufacturers up their game.
Phone Arena released leaked images of what is believed to be the new tablet, which seems to follow the lines of the bestselling Samsung Galaxy phones. From the pictures, it looks like there will be two cameras.
Google-branded handsets are often used as a showcase for new technologies, with the search giant partnering with different hardware providers for the software.
The competition: Apple's latest iPad on offers a fantastic experience in the hand - put a painful one in the pocket
The Windows version of a tablet: A The new Surface was unveiled by Microsoft last week
The last Google Nexus phone, which introduced NFC, or contactless payments, was made by Samsung.
Nexus phones and presumably tablets always receive Google software updates at the earliest opportunity, so this tablet is likely to be the first one to get a 'Jelly Bean' upgrade, the next version of Android which is due in the Autumn.
A seven-inch also provides a successful stake against Apple. Apple - at least when ran by Steve Jobs - refused the smaller size model as Jobs was not a fan.
However, Apple may be about to turn around on this stance. Manufacturers have allegedly received orders for a seven-inch 'iPad Mini' from Apple.
Other competition comes from Microsoft, which is finally getting in to the tablet market with Surface, their own operating system based off the back of Windows.
The first appearance of the Surface was welcomed by tech pundits, but it is likely to be priced as a premium model.
One thing that is not known is whether the tablet will have a 3G SIM slot for mobile broadband. Google may choose to save on the cost, and make use of the ability of Android phones to share their internet wirelessly with other devices.
The Google conference, known as the I/O conference or the Input/Output conference, starts in San Francisco on Wednesday.
The conference is expected to include information and launch dates for Google's latest 3D mapping projects and other projects bubbling away in the Google labs.
When couples are having problems in a relationship, communication is the first thing to stop. It is often easier to just be quiet than to get mad. When rebuilding relationships, just as communication was the first to stop, it now needs to be the first to start. This will require that both individuals let down their guard and pretty much throw caution to the wind. Healing in the relationship cannot start until you talk. Make an agreement that you will talk about anything and everything and that you will listen, really listen. That does not mean that you will agree with everything, which is perfectly fine. However, if you do not agree, do not yell, rather, the two of you need to calmly discuss the issue and together, work out a solution. This is hard work but within a very short time, you will both feel much better, individually and as a couple.
