1. At the time of marriage, a north Indian girl has more boyfriends
than her age.
2. Before marriage, she looks almost like a bollywood heroine and
after marriage you have to go around her twice to completely hug her.
3. By the time she professes her undevoted love to you, you are
bankrupt because of the number of times you had to take her out to
movies, theatres and restaurants. And you wait longingly for her dowry.
4. The only dishes she can think of to cook is paneer butter masala,
aloo sabji, aloo gobi sabji, aloo matar, aloo paneer, that after
eating all those paneer and aloos you are either in the bed with
chronic cholestrol or chronic gas disorder.
5. The only growth that you see later in your career is the rise in
your monthly phone bill.
6. You are blinded by her love that you think that she is a blonde.
Only later do you come to know that it is because of the mehandhi that
she applies to cover her grey hair.
7. When you come home from office she is very busy watching "Kyonki
saas bhi kabi bahu thi" that you either end up eating outside or
cooking yourself.
8. You are a very "ESpecial" person to her.
9. She always thought that Madras is a state and covers the whole of
south india until she met you.
10. When she says she is going to "work out" she means she is going to
" walk out"
11. She has greater number of relatives than the number of people you
have in your home town.
12. The only two sentences in English that she knows are "Thank you"
and "How are you"
*** WHAT IT MEANS TO HAVE A South Indian GIRL as WIFE ***
1.Her mother looks down at you because you didn't study in IIT or
Madras / Anna University .
2. Her father starts or ends every conversation with " ... I say..."
3. She shudders if you use four letter words.
4. She has long hair, neatly oiled and braided (The Dubai based Oil
Well Company will negotiate with her on a 25 year contract to extract
coconut oil from her hair.)
5. She uses the word 'Super' as her only superlative.
6. Her name is another name for a Goddess or a flower.
7. Her first name is longer than your first name, middle name and
surname combined (unless you are from Andhra)
8. When she mixes milk/curd and rice you are never sure whether it is
for the dog or for herself.
9. For weddings, she sports a mini jasmine garden on her head and
wears silk saris in the Madras heat without looking too uncomfortable
while you are melting in your singlet.
10. Her favourite cricketer is Krishnamachari Srikkanth.
11. Her favourite food is dosa though she has tried North Indian
snacks like Chats (pronounced like the slang for 'conversation' )
12. She bores you by telling you which raaga each song you hear is
based on.
13. You have to give her jewellery, though she has already got plenty
of it ..
14. Her Mangal Sutra weighs more than the championship belts worn by
WWF wrestlers.
15. Her father thinks she is much smarter than you..... :D ;D
Sankaranand Balaradjou
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